Hey, guys! I hope you had a great week!
Let’s talk about relationships and not just any kind of relationship, but one of the most important relationship there is, aka the relationship with OURSELVES. Today I want to give you the best advice about self-love.
I spotted this quote by Lucille Ball earlier this week: “Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.” Can I get an amen?!
Often, we spend time maintaining social relationships and pouring ourselves into others without realizing that we aren’t feeding ourselves the same love. Imagine how you treat yourself on a daily basis if you were another person, in a relationship with you.
Are you kind to yourself?
If I answered this question for myself, the answer would be no. I continually beat myself up over things I believe could be better in my life. Either it is my weight, where I am in my career, my not so flawless skin. However, at the drop of a hat, I’d be ready to tell a friend that they’re crazy for thinking that anything is wrong with them.
I grew up in a household where encouragement was a little thing called tough love. I can recall one day when I came home from school (I believe I was in 8th grade) with a test score of 80%. The first thing out of my mom’s mouth was, “Why couldn’t you have gotten 100%?” Hence, my fixation on the negatives.
Something I have learned over the past months is that self-love is something that I have to practice each day conscientiously. The moment I began to practice the art of self-love is the very moment I began to see the positives in life.
Since meeting Nick, I have been more open to the positivity around me. He’s played a part in helping me focus on the positives attributes of myself and life. It hasn’t been easy, and I do have days where I have many doubts about my abilities, but reciting my positive affirmations helps.
Here’s my prescription for self-love:
1. Create a self-love ritual – My thing to do is unwinding with one of my favorite shows whether it be comedy or drama coupled with wine (if available at home) while applying my face mask. Other times, I’ll unwind with a good book.
2. Practice daily affirmations. You would be surprised at how well this works. A few simple words powerful enough to change your mood.
3. Learning to say no. Don’t over-schedule, over-book or over-commit. We usually feel compelled to help others, but over time, we are only harming ourselves and opening doors to becoming taken advantage of. Saying no doesn’t make you a bad person, it makes you smart.
4. Give up the need for approval from others. “You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the word, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches.” – Dita Von Tesse
5. Keep your self-talk positive. Turn down the volume on your inner critic and choose to be your best coach or cheerleader. I’m still working on this one.
6. Lastly, Learn to forgive yourself. As humans, we are our own worst critics. We are not built to be perfect. We make mistakes. Use each opportunity, good or bad, to grow. Sometimes we just need to stop and remind ourselves that we are human. Be gentle with yourself.
Self-love is a journey. It takes devotion and practice, Resolve to love yourself every day and watch how your life will change for the better.
I would like for us to try an exercise in the comments section together. Share three things you love about yourself.
Here are mine: 1.) I love how pleased I feel when others are happy, 2.) I love my ability to make others laugh, 3.) I love my corny jokes! Your turn 😉